Sunday, February 3, 2008


The Fruit-of-the-Month-Club is not just a handy way to sum up my friend Clark's dating habits.

Clark, a one-man cornucopia, on Thanksgiving 2006

The Fruit-of-the-Month-Club is also a mail-order bonanza, as invented by brothers Harry and David Rosenberg of Medford, Oregon, better knowns as

Yes, that's right, there were Jews in Oregon in the early 1900s. And in southern Oregon no less. With the world as their orchard, they came up with the lucrative idea of sending people gifts of fresh fruit throughout the year.

You can practically hear their mother kvelling! My sons, not only are they earning a nice little living with this mail-order mishegas, but thanks to these little mensches, people across the can enjoy a healthy nosh, even if there are maybe blizzard conditions in their own backyards.

And I must admit, when my friends Paula and Eve served up a lovely dessert last night of fresh-from-who-knows-how-far-away peaches soaked in wine and dolloped with mascarpone cheese, I was glad they had blown their monthly postal produce allotment on me.

But on the way home, I started to look that gift peach in the pit. Yummy, yes, but was it ethical? Shouldn't we be eating locally? Isn't the trans-hemispheric transporting of food a major contributor to environmentally-devastating climate change? Oughtn't we support family-owned farms by eating whatever organic produce is in season in the region?

Then it hit me like the Godzilla of Global Warming . . .
the mighty, mighty roar
the Locavore!

(That Locavore is taking out the Rosenbergs like he is some sort of reptilian Roy Cohn)

I guess the safest bet is to dish up some parsnips in wine with mascarpone for the next couple of months.


Baroness von Bloggenschtern said...

Found out about your blog by word of mouth - I've gone back to earlier posts and must say, that I LOVE your writing (and your penchant for faux fur prints - fabulosity!). Rest assured I will be back, once I clean up those nasty Harry & David carcasses that some large beast must have pooped out in our backyard.

Eve said...

Oh my god I think I have to go into the witness protection program otherwise I will be run out of Portland by a mob of hemp rope wielding locavores
Eve (yes that Eve)

Anonymous said...

Dear Ms. Macaronimaniac--I just caught up on your blog--you are so prolific and so witty! and can you believe I grew up in Harry and David's town and didn't know they were Jewish? I always thought Jackson & Perkins were their respective last names since that was the rose-growing branch of the same company.

Congrats on getting more mileage out of the Foreman video.