Sunday, January 20, 2008

Lesbiriffic Mommy Merch

What do you get for the new mother who literally wrote the book on modern parenting?
Could little old childless me actually help Ariel Gore (who, to be precise, has written/edited five books on parenting, plus a zillion issues of Hip Mama zine) with a parenting issue - by creating a styling gift for her new baby?

Does a bear breastfeed in the woods?

Let's start with a little background. Color it lavender. Because Portland is a veritable modern day Land of Lesbos. And we've got the subarus, comfortable footwear, and womyn's softball league to prove it. Halloween in my neighborhood is a steady parade of adorable Chinese adoptees ringing the doorbell while their proud mommies watch protectively from the sidewalk.

But it turns out that when a couple of nice gals get themselves knocked up by a friendly volunteer donor, it can still cause confusion for the community at large. When we met up with Ariel and Maria for what I like to think of as Baby's First Happy Hour (it's not exactly a bris, but still we should observe its ritual importance), they reported that the staff at their pediatrician's office was unclear on the lesbian parenting concept. The staff was so hung up on the traditional hetero familiy model, they assumed Maria was the mother and Ariel was the grandmother. Such ignorance is terrifying. Mostly because Ariel is younger than me, which is way way way way way too young to be a grandmother.

Oh yeah, and because it ignores that whole Love Makes a Family, rainbow supergraphics in the nursery, Every Lesbian Mother is a Working Lesbian Mother reality.

"I just want to get a pin or something we can stick on Max, so we don't have to keep explaining," Ariel said.

And that's what made me think up this.

It's not exactly haute couture, but then again, this kid is going to be dressed by lesbians. As long as it doesn't clash with Guatemalan pants, he's good to go.

And the best part is, you can get one for the child in your life by clicking here. Available in both infant and kid sizes. No verification of actual maternal sexuality needed. In fact, my friend Holly said she wants to get one for her daughter just to see how her husband's mother will react. So get yours today!

And send one to every Tom, Dick, or Heather who has two mommies you know.

Because wouldn't it be nice if the Sapphic sartorial splendor of this family

could be shared by this family?

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