Sunday, October 26, 2008

All the Blogs I've Been Writing For, Which Is Why I Haven't Been Writing Here


It's official.

I am a yenta.

Yes, in the fine tradition of Abigail Van Buren, Ann Landers, and Dan Savage, I am now the author of an advice column.

Click, read, and learn.

And nu, send your question (and/or a cupcake) to shmethicist@jcarrot.org.

Unlike Bea Arthur, however, I am not Yenta the Matchmaker. Or at least, I am not Yenta Who Guarantees You a Nice Jewish Boy.

I am actually the most exogamous Jew on the planet.

Okay, maybe I could be a little more exogamous. For example, I'm not married to the Pope.

But I am now apparently, in addition to being the Dear Abby of the Appetizers, a recognized expert on interfaith relationships. Because the editor of Interfaith Family read my earlier post on the Jew and the Carrot, then started reading this blog, from which she figured out I was shtupping a goy, and thus asked me to write an article for Interfaith Family.

Most of the articles on Interfaith Family are very serious. They are about things like how to find a clergy person to perform your wedding (my solution: just live in sin!) or how to prep your goyishe in-laws for their supporting role in your son's bris (my solution: when it comes to genital-related incisions, a vasectomy nips the whole problem of what to do with the kids in the bud, as it were).

Yes, Interfaith Family takes on some serious issues. My solution? Write an article showing why really it's way easier to be in an intefaith relationship than, G-d forbid, to marry a Jew.

Because Jews are a big pain in the observance.

But we are also wordy. So, I promise now that I've blogged everywhere else, I'll blog here again soon.

Signed,
Pre-Posting and Preposterous

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